Notes From My Studio #1

Behind-the-scenes as I prep for a solo exhibition

I’m working on a big solo exhibition for February, so I thought it would be cool to start a new series on my Substack to bring you behind-the-scenes to my creative process.

This series is called ‘Notes From My Studio’ and it will be an in-depth look at how I create as a social practice artist and researcher.

So, I have this show coming up titled “Echoes of Nzinga.” The curator for the show is Jay “Ghost” Sanchez. Ghost was compelled by a historical story he came across—the story of Queen Nzinga— and he thought it would be really cool to make an exhibition based on her story, modernizing it to respond to our times. Nzinga’s story is one of trauma, treachery, rebellion, and leadership. She lost her father; her brother murdered her child, sterilized her, and ran her out of her own village. She returned to her village and became a hero, successfully fending off colonizers for several decades. See more on her story in this awesome video.

Ghost stated his overarching goal for this exhibition is women’s empowerment during times of disempowerment. So, I went to task and started prepping my studio to make works based on this theme with the specific goal of empowering women (fems and thems) in times of disempowerment. The theme and overarching goal excited me so much because of the historical connection to our present and understanding women's rights as a legacy of endless fighting but it also highlights the interconnection between anti-colonialism and the human rights of fems and thems.

Queen Nzinga’s story is very traumatic but also very dynamic, so my first task was figuring out how I—an optimistic, whimsical artist— gracefully depict a woman’s story of trauma and rise to power. So I sat with her story for a week or so. After mulling it over, I decided to focus on her leadership style and her ability to protect freedom, foster hope, and keep her culture despite traumatic, horrible events.

Next, I took to my sketchbook and I started thinking about my frustrations with women not working together and women who vote against their interests, but then I was like ‘Ohh, that's too negative and not on target.’ So then I pivoted to brainstorming what phrases and symbols I need to hear or see to let go of some of the feminine pressures our society puts on us—i.e. make ourselves smaller, not be domineering or ‘bossy’, etc. How do we let go of this culture of apologizing for demanding what we're owed and taking up space? I wanted to find ways to communicate that we're all part of a collective and that together we are powerful and our fates are intertwined. I take my time in this stage, mulling over the theme and how it relates to my own life, what I see in my friendships, relationships, and greater society and how can I respond to that need with visually enticing imagery or quotes to embroider.

In my next step, I think about what materials might communicate my message best, and then I go to the thrift store or an estate sale and try to find those fabrics. Fortunately, in my new studio setup, I have a room to store my art supplies. I had collected a lot of fabric from estate sales back in December. I knew back then that I wanted to have a show dedicated to a critique of femininity, so when Jay approached me for this show I was like ‘ohh I know exactly what I'm gonna use these fabrics for now!’

So, I lay out all the fabrics that convey the vibe of the room that I want to create. This show will be my second attempt at making an immersive show where works are hanging from the ceiling. So I'm quite nervous about that, but I think it'll look amazing when it comes together. It's just something I've rarely done before, so it's a little nerve-wracking and takes a little bit of ingenuity to figure out how I will hang some of these objects and how they might be received in this space.

Back to the fabrics: I lay out all the fabrics. I see what colors I have. I like most of the textures, but that doesn't mean that the colors go together. Since color is important to my practice, I narrow down to colors of my natural palette when I'm making hopeful work. Then I move on to making each individual piece deciding what quote or symbol makes sense on what material, what kind of impact I want it to have, and how it might be hung.

In my next phase of prep, I get into the graphic design elements, and I find and create what symbols, photos references, fonts, and phrases I want. I size them to what I think will look good on each piece of fabric.

Caveat: I like using reuse fabric (aka upcycled fabric) from thrift stores and estate sales because I don't want to be wasteful or contribute to the harm the fashion industry causes to workers and the planet via labor practices and textile waste. Reusing/Upcycling fabric is more freeing because it's had a life before me, and I don't mind altering it to have a new life. It's also super cheap. I've probably paid less than $60 for all the fabric in my studio. But if I were buying this fabric brand new, easily that price would probably be closer to $800+. I also feel better using reuse fabric because I know I’m not directly contributing to imperial sweatshop labor and I’m preventing the reused material from ending up in a landfill...at least for the time being. I like finding fabrics at estate sales specifically because I’m encouraged to creatively reimagine objects like napkins, tablecloths, aprons, anything fabric, and even clocks into art supplies. Estate sales might be my new favorite hobby!

Normally when I'm creating work, I'm also consuming a lot of content and dissecting it for similar themes. So I keep my sketchbook on hand for when ideas might spark me. Here are a couple of pictures from my sketchbook from when I was away on a trip to Columbus, OH last month.

Another part of my process is working on new works while I’m wrapping up the old. So, I’m finishing two paintings that have been sitting in my storage for about a year. They will finally see the light of day soon when my show opens on February 8^th.

My next step in preparing for my exhibition is thinking about who I am serving. As I'm making the work I think about who in my life this work is actually for and who it would be helpful to, and I make a guest list in my sketchbook of people that I will send special invitations to. For this show, I will be inviting women who are leaders and members of women's rights organizations, trans rights organizations, and women's special interest groups.

Honestly, I go through these steps iteratively depending on the day. After I've marinated on the theme long enough, one of the final steps of prep is making a flyer that depicts the vibe of the show. Here she is.

Well, this is my creative update for this week. Enjoy your week, and stay warm out there!